Cooked by TFW: Hummus
Welp! We made it! Week 2 of “Using Tahini in Our Other Meals.” Waaaait… Last week was HOW to make Tahini… so does that count…?
…and what is the meaning of life…?
…if our brains are just bits of electricity causing chemical reactions, who are we fundamentally…?
[Dramatic Long Pause. Feel free to make yourself a drink before continuing to read]
You know what? I’m just going to call it “Week 2 of Tahini Season.”
This week’s recipe is one of the top three requested dishes at the gym, Hummus. I made a batch a few months ago and gave some of it to a few folks and they’ve been chasing me for it ever since. Depending on the depths of your patience and commitment level to the hummus, this could be an all day event, or it could take you about 5 minutes. As always, follow your heart, but you know how to win mine… the long way.
Before we hop into the recipe itself, I want to give a giant shout out to Breigh and Richard for two amazing Muay Thai wins this past weekend! If I wasn’t in pesky Fight Camp – DID YOU KNOW I WAS IN FIGHT CAMP?! – I would have made the two their own Victory Cookies. And I know at least one of y’all ask why my diet affects food made for other… acting like I don’t take a few for myself whenever I make food for anyone… There is such a thing as a stupid question; do better. Fortunately, Breigh has agreed to be a taste tester for Fight Camp-Safe Victory Dessert! I’m in the lab at #CookedByTFW HQ right now working on it and will report back with the results.
Until then, lets get this hummus going!
- 1 16oz Bag of Dry Chickpeas/Garbanzo Beans (ORRRR 1 15oz can chickpeas/garbanzo)
- 1/4 Cup Lemon Juice (Be bold, be brave: get a lemon and squeeze it yourself!)
- 1/4 cup Tahini
- 3-5 Garlic Cloves… Or less if you don’t like garlic (or happiness…)
- 2 Tablespoons of Neutral-Flavored Oil (I used Canola, but Olive and Grapeseed are fine)
- 1/2 Teaspoon Ground Cumin
- Salt to taste
1. This is more of a Pro Tip than a Step 1. The Chickpeas. If you got a can of them, skip this… use the extra hours you saved writing an apology letter to your taste buds for taking the easy way out… again. If you got the Bag-o-Beans, you gotta soak and cook them first. Follow the directions on the bag on how to do all of that. Here’s the Pro Tip: 2 Teaspoons of baking soda. I soak my beans overnight, adding a teaspoon of baking soda to the water. And when I cook the chickpeas, another teaspoon in that water, too. Why? It’s all about taking that skin off the bean. (I’m super sleepy, y’all… please make your own dirty joke here.)
Quick Story: The first time I made hummus, I didn’t use baking soda at any point… I knew I had to take the skin off to make the BEST hummus of my life… and, I swear to the holy Food Yeezus, I spent an HOUR meticulously peeling the skin off of a pound of cooked chickpeas. I’m trying to save y’all’s lives here. We already spend 1/3 of our lives sleeping; you wanna spend another third peeling chickpeas because Tym talked you out of getting a can of pre-peel, ready-to-go chickpeas and you’re too frugal to “waste” 2 dang teaspoons of baking soda?! Not even baking powder. BAKING. SODA. No, you don’t. And I don’t want you to, either.
2. The rest of this is pretty easy. I just spent over 200 words on a faux-step. One day, we’ll have a short recipe, gang… I promise!* Now that your chickpeas are ready for ascension into Hummus Heaven™, toss the tahini and lemon juice in your food processor and combine the two into creamy goodness. Every so often, scrape the sides and process some more. Do this for about a minute or three. The creamier, the better.
3. Add the garlic, cumin, and oil and process for another minute or so. Finally, add half your chickpeas and a pinch of salt. Get that going (this is the best direction in any recipe ever. “Get that going.” I’m officially the Larry, The Cable Guy [I seriously just googled if there was a comma in Larry The Cable Guy, and there isn’t… but I’m not a savage, and my mom has a masters degree from Columbia; I refuse to omit a comma where one is needed] of Food) and then gradually add the remaining chickpeas. Process until smooth. If your hummus is a little thick, or still has large chickpea chunks, you can add just a little more lemon juice, or water, BUT BE CAREFUL! Speaking from experience: I flew a little too close to the sun with the water and it made my hummus a little too thin and runny…
And there you have it! After months of people badgering me, you people FINALLY have my hummus recipe. Cut zero corners and you’ll have the best hummus of your life. Buy canned chickpeas and… I dunno… I couldn’t even tell you what would happen, because winners don’t cut corners and here at TFW we are all winners. Be sure to share your homemade hummus pics on all the social medias using the hashtag #CookedByTFW, and – as always – thank me in the morning!
*I make zero promises. Time is relative. Healthy, delicious food is worth the words. If you want quick and sloppy go find Guy Fieri’s food blog.