Cooked by TFW: Fight Camp Ice Cream
Ladies and Gentlemen of the internets… I have broken the Matrix, and I am here to free your minds, tongues, and hearts from gustatory tyranny! Who will follow me to freedom, to the new world we shall build TOGETHER?!
Today’s recipe is a culmination of hard work, research, both trial AND error, being in fight camp – DID YOU KNOW I WAS IN FIGHT CAMP?! – and still wanting to celebrate my teammates’ victories.
Today’s recipe is a culmination of hard work, research, both trial AND error, being in fight camp – DID YOU KNOW I WAS IN FIGHT CAMP?! – and still wanting to celebrate my teammates’ victories. Shout out to my self-proclaimed “Gym Girlfriend” and “Food Bae,” Breigh Wareiczuk for being the taste-tester for this glorious creation. Congrats again to her and Richard for their two dominating wins at the beginning of the month.
In July, I showed y’all how to make my award-winning Victory Cookies (link hurrr: https://www.tfwmma.com/news/2017/7/26/cooked-by-tfw-treat-yourself-with-victory-cookies). Oh, the awful things to nice people I would do for a batch of those bad boys right now, but I’m still in fight ca… DID YOU KNOW I WAS IN FIGHT CAMP?! Boom! A Double Didcha in today’s recipe, how lucky are you all? What are you going to wear to the awards ceremony? Who are you going to bring? I can’t wait for you to tell you grandkids where you were the day you read, “Did you know I was in fight camp” in all caps in a single blog post… I suppose you’d have to explain to your grandkids what a “blog post” was first… I wonder what the internet will look like in the future… ya know, since I broke the Matrix and all making a fight camp-friendly ice cream…
Have I even mentioned what today’s recipe is yet? Oh, well, SURPRISE! Today’s recipe is an ice cream we can all enjoy. Me, a strappingly handsome, still young man in his prime yet brutally dangerous and feared mauler in the cage currently in the middle of fight camp – DID YOU KNOW I WAS IN FIGHT CAMP?! THE TRIFECTA!!!!!!! Kiss your loved ones; it’s the end of days! – AND you, the… um… person reading this, aspiring to be in better control of your diet so that one day, you too can maim your foes with ruthless aggression and/or look great naked just like me!
Yeah, I said it; it had to be said… Honestly, I’ve had this recipe blog since April; I’m genuinely surprised it hasn’t been said sooner. I’m gorgeous! And you are, too!*
Anyway… Today’s recipe is a delicious, you-know-what camp acceptable dessert that is super easy to make and – say it with me kids, for the first time in weeks – VERSATILE! It’s can easily be a single ingredient dish – all you need is banana – but today I’m going to show you how I made it for Breigh after her fight. So without further ado, let’s get to making magic!
- 3-5 Ripe Bananas
- 2 Teaspoons Cocoa Powder (I, of course, used dark chocolate, but follow your heart)
- 1/2 Teaspoon Cinnamon
- 1/2Teaspoon Salt
- 2 Tablespoons Agave Nectar
- 1-3 Tablespoons Greek Yogurt (too help make it smooth and creamy)
1. Freeze Your Bananas. I tried it two ways. Once freezing the bananas whole and then try to peel and chop them up once frozen. The other was to peel and cut into slices, then freeze. Honesty, the biggest difference was the messiness of cutting frozen whole bananas; they start to thaw a little. Follow your heart. If you freeze whole unpeeled, just toss them in the freezer. If you peel them and leave them whole or peel and cut up, put them in a freezer bag before you toss in the freezer… I can’t believe I had to include that as an instruction, but here we are. Freeze them from a minimum 6 hours or more.
2. Food Processor Time. Remove the bananas from the freezer (and bag, when applicable). Pro Tip for those who froze them unpeeled, cut the banana in half lengthwise. It’ll really help with unpeeling. Toss your cut up frozen banana in the food processor with a little salt and turn it on high until it turns into a cream. You can add a tablespoon or so of Greek yogurt to help with the creamification (that’s a real word… that I just invented).
And that’s essentially all there is to it! That alone will produce a healthy alternative to your traditional ice cream. Now you could stop there, oooooooooor you could be the Queen of Mean and kick a woman’s head off, earning yourself something special. So let’s make it special!
3. Add The Extras. Once you’ve tossed your bananas and pinch of salt into the food process, add the cocoa, cinnamon, and agave, then blast the thing on high. With the agave, you might not need as much yogurt, so hold off on adding any until you see how well things go without it. You can always add a little more cocoa or cinnamon (or any other ingredients you’d like… Nutella sounds fun! I miss Nutella so much these days), but too much makes this a little too decadent, and we’re trying to enjoy a healthier alternative to regular ice cream.
And there you have it! Next to last week’s meal, this is my second greatest creation. We’re gonna shut down Ben, Jerry, Bryers, Dannon, Halo… Dairy Queen, too, I guess?… Coldstone, TCBY (do those still exist?), and anyone else who I forgot to mentions… we are shutting down EVERYONE! We now hold the keys to happiness right in our local produce aisles! Go forth, my fellow home cooks, and enjoy your lives unshackled to Big Sugar™… I did this for you! I did this… for us!
Remember to share your versions of this delight on all the social medias using the hashtag #CookedByTFW. And – as always – thank me in the morning!
*Especially now that you’ve been following my culinary guidance… my, shall we say, “food-telage.” Puns are awesome!